Brainy jokes from scientists at The Cern Laboratory - OK, it is the end of the week and a testing month.
1. A Higgs boson walks into a bar and asks everyone to take part in an act of penitence. "What are you doing?" asks the barman. "Giving mass."
2. What did the proton say to the ever-grumpy electron? "Why do you have to be so negative all the time?"
3. Two atoms are walking down the street. One says to the other, "Hey! I think I lost an electron!" The other says, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I'm positive!"
4. Why are quantum physicists crap in bed? Because when they find the position, they can't find the momentum, and when they have the momentum, they can't find the position.
5. A Higgs boson walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What's the matter?" The Higgs replies: "Exactly."
Here is another Higgs boson joke:
David Fuller's view My favourites are 1 & 5, and here is another Higgs boson joke:
A Higgs boson walks into a church. The priest says, "Get out, you blasphemer. How dare you call yourself the 'God particle'?" The Higgs boson replies: "But I make up the mass."